Are there ground rules when you start a relationship? Are those rules different for each relationship? How about the rule when you are already in one? Each person that you are with is diverse, and the likes and opinions of each vary. The course of any relationship depends on the couple’s nature, understanding, compatibility and the way they complement each other. Some relations mature as the years pass, which makes the bond stronger and the relationship more powerful.
Apart from this there are some rules that people in love need to follow, or else the love might just flee. These rules are forever, not only applicable for the initial phases. Let’s start with the first one. It is vital to continue expressing your feelings and emotions even if the relationship is decades old.
You have to let your beloved know how special they are and how much you love them.
One should not just cease being sensitive towards their loved ones although many argue that the nitty-gritty of love is shown in our everyday behavior.
It is vital to understand that words of love, said out loud, sound beautiful even if a couple has been together for many a years. Keep up the subtle romantic gestures and plan things for your loved one.
If there are ideas both of you don’t approve of, talk about it instead of trying to analyze what the other one is plotting. There are couples who would not want to converse if they have different outlook. They would not want to bend ways, which piles things up for a huge discussion later.
Try to resolve misunderstanding without being judgmental. Assumption is a big no-no in any relationship. If your loved one has a baggage, don’t keep that as leverage on your side. You have accepted the person with their pasts and problems. You have no right to talk about the previous relationship and remind them time and again on why and how it did not work.
Always remember that your partner has been with you in difficult as well as happy, so never take their feelings for granted. There will be a time before you realize your loved one might not be around .You need to be grateful in all relationships. When the effort to pull things together become one sided, the relationship goes on short term, it’s always better when the attempt is both ways.
If you no longer feel as strongly for the relationship as you used to feel, confess. Instead of living in a claustrophobic environment and trying to be what you are not, you should make peace with the fact that the changes in you are for good and the person who loves you will understand that. You just need to present things in a clear way.
The last rule is to be true to yourself. If there are things you don’t like, find alternatives.
Heart to Heart with Malvika
The writer is a Chartered Accountant and Client Servicing Executive at JWT Thompson Nepal.
