Embracing and admiring relationships

When a girl gets married; she is not only married to her groom but also with his entire family. She becomes the daughter-in-law, sister-in-law and years later a mother and she is bound to many other relationships. There are many misconceptions about marriage. One of them is related to the relationship between a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Probably, the most dreaded and talked topic of marriage would be mother-in-law being problematic. However, it might not be true in reality.

And it's not our fault to think so because we are brought up in such an environment, where our mind has been trained to accept that mother-in-laws are very harsh, strict and rude to their daughter-in-laws. Then, they never have compassion towards each other. Thus after marriage, a girl has that conscious mind on how she must act. Even though, she consoles herself that such things don't matter and exist, somewhere in her heart come those bitter statements about mother-in-laws and the same goes with the daughter-in-law. But these are just a mind game nothing else than that.

I have a different opinion to it, "Don’t believe in all the horrid stories you hear." First of all, let’s not be judgmental about any relationships, be it between friends, be it between husband and wife, be it between brothers or sisters, be it between mother –in-law and daughter-in-law and so on. We must teach these kinds of morals to our children too. We must have the same feelings; same affection and same respect for the girl/boy’s family. Talking about my experience, our relationship as mother-in-law and daughter-in-law till date is just amazing. She is a mother to me. She is the most cheerful person I have ever met in my life. She directs everything so well. I am so fortunate to have her in my life. Mine was a love marriage. I eloped with my husband and got married because my family had denied our love relationships. Meanwhile, my mother-in-law never made me feel lonely. There was no boredom in the house. She dances, cracks jokes, makes the atmosphere so lively. I am really amazed by her personality. In my off days in the winter season, we used to sit in the sun. She used to comb my hair. Even the neighbors would get surprised and they would admire our beautiful relationships.

She is the best single mother to her both sons as well. She is a single mother in the sense that my father-in-law had died two decades earlier. Likewise, she is always ready to assist the ones who need her. She tries her very best to reach out to everyone or attends puja, marriage ceremonies or parties on their first call. She is that kind of a human being with a helpful nature. She is the best cook too. Sometimes I wonder how a person can be so multitalented. Now, she is a grandmother of two grandkids. Through my maternity journey and till now, she is so very supportive. My mother- in- law gave up her teaching profession after my first birth, so that I could go to the office. She might have joined it later. She is the best grandmother for my kids too. She has given her best for the great growth of my both children. Sometimes, of course, conflicts do happen but that’s not a big deal.

All relationships experience misunderstandings, miscommunications or disagreements. We sort it out by having healthy conversations. In conclusion, I would like to say that the relationships should be done by heart. We must have a positive outlook toward everything. Life is too short to hold grudges. Just be yourself. Every person has both good and bad traits in them. Embrace and admire the good qualities and let go of the bad ones. Main thing is about being optimistic. We must see the things from the other people’s aspect too.

Having realistic expectations is the key to creating healthy and comfortable relationships. Therefore, through this article, I would like to thank my mother-in-law for being just her and so calm and patient. I would like to ask for an apology, if I’ve ever hurt you. But, that was never done and I promise I will never do it intentionally. I respect you and can’t thank the Lord enough for your presence in my life. I am not expressive about my feelings toward you. But only God knows or my talks about you with my sisters or friends know how much I adore you. Sometimes, I may be aggressive but please do not judge it in the wrong way. I love you from the bottom of my heart.