Dear Sadichha,
I am a 22-year-old guy currently studying doctor of pharmacy (pharm.D) in India. I am doing wellwith my studies but I want to help my parents financially. Recently my sister got a full scholarship; I was happy also crushed that I didn’t get a scholarship because my expenses are high. I get emotional very easily, so please suggest me what to do as I am not confident that I will be able to juggle between work and studies.
As children, we always dream of doing something for our parents in return for all that they have done for us. I feel it’s very mature of you wanting to help your parents financially. However, you need to prioritize your studies now. What’s gone is gone, so don’t let not getting a scholarship make you feel any less important. Focus on your present. I am sure all that your parents expect from you at this moment is for you to do well in your studies. You doing well in your studies now is going to give them more happiness than you earning money right now will. So, I suggest you to not let these things bother you. Set a career path and focus on your studies now, so that you can support and take care of your parents later.
Dear Sadichha,
I am a 28-year-old married woman. Three years ago, I got married but lost my spouse in a bike accident. My in-laws and family don’t have any problem with me starting a new life with somebody else. But I have not been able to come out of this trauma. My family has started looking out for a suitable life partner for me knowing that I have decided not to ever get married again. They keep consoling me saying I need someone to move ahead in life but I can’t find my interest in all these things now. I don’t know what to do? Should I just go with the flow?
From the experience of a close family member, I know what you are going through. So, all I want to say is to take your time. Personally, I do believe that life is too long and precious to spend alone. Also, I think you are very lucky to have supportive in-laws and family members. However, all of this doesn’t mean you have to get married right away. But you do have to try to move on. I know it’s easier said than done. The void that the loss of a loved one creates can never really be filled, but one can try. I urge you to start being more social and maybe find activities to be engaged in. The decision to remarry is yours, and yours solely. Not my opinion or anyone else’s should matter. I know it’s a big step, so do take your time and think about it. It’s your life after all.
Heart to heart with Sadichha Shrestha
Dear Sadichha,
I am a 19-year-old girl from Hetauda. I moved to Kathmandu a year ago with my parents. I enrolled in a college which I find very new and unfriendly. My parents go to work and I feel alone after I return from my college. I don’t find it good here; I feel like moving back to Hetauda to my grandparents. But my parents want me to stay here. They think I’ll be able to excel professionally in Kathmandu, but I feel just the opposite. Is it something that I should work on? Do I need to change my perspective?
A new environment is always challenging. Since you have been in Hetauda all this while, Kathmandu will seem different in many ways. I suggest that you give it some time. Just as you are taking time to adjust in your new surrounding, the people around you are also taking the time to adjust with you. Make friends outside the college as well. Companionship is very important. Join extra-curricular activities that interest you. At such a young age like yours, I think you should get to know and understand yourself better as well. This way you’ll make more friends and discover new hobbies. In many aspects, I do believe that Kathmandu will be able to give you more opportunities, especially in terms of good education. Also, as your parents are here, I think it will be easier for you. Once you are done with your studies, you can always go back to Hetauda to create opportunities for yourself and others.
Dear Sadichha,
I am a 23-year-old girl. I recently graduated from Tribhuvan University. Although I am not that fascinated by the education system here, I want to stay here and do something on my own. However, my parents have been recommending me to go abroad for further studies. But I feel so unprepared about going to a totally unknown place. If you could share, I wanted to hear out your experience about how you felt living abroad? How did you cope with the circumstances there?
What your parents want and what you want are not two different things. Your parents want you to go abroad to pursue your studies, not settle there. You want to do something here in Nepal, which you can start now if you want to, or after your masters either from here or abroad. So, it’s your choice; decide where you want to study. My personal experience of studying abroad was very fruitful. I not only get a good degree but also had the chance to rediscover myself, and I personally think I matured and evolved as a human being. A new place will bring both challenges and opportunities. It all depends on how a person takes on the challenges.
