Let's celebrate 'Opposite Day'

After reading the article in Republica, “Nepalis sell property in Nepal to buy in US,” I was struck that this must be Opposite Day, as there was a time when expats came to Nepal because the cost of living was just a fraction of what it was costing them to survive in their home country of origin.

The thought that a Nepali can sell a cold store-size plot of land in Kathmandu and then purchase a suburban Maryland home is just mind-boggling, and confirms my thinking that the world turned upside down while I was asleep. But I should have suspected as much when I last paid the equivalent of US$3 for a 33-cent can of American beans at Shrestha’s Store. These are truly opposite days, and days that are far, far away from those spent by the expats of former Freak Street.

What is now observed in New Nepal is a foreign exchange program that is placing 200,000+ well-off Nepalis into suburban America, while uprooted Americans look elsewhere for a nicer (and cheaper) place to call home. However, in this particular downturn of the global economy, I doubt many Americans will be looking to relocate here (to the future Switzerland of Asia) – not when a bottle of Heinz Ketchup is costing well over 2 bucks.

But hoping not to sound like a whining foreigner, I’ll stop this kvetching with the observation that at least in some neighborhoods in America, there will be an improvement as more Nepalis move in and restore America to what it once was: Laundry hanging on the rooftops and children playing in the streets.

Continuing with the Opposite Day theme, how about those bandas? A Nepali researcher from Tufts University asked me this week about my thoughts on Nepali bandas—did I feel they were good or bad? The question invoked one of my first memories of Nepal, back in 2001 or so, when I lived in Boudha and I though banda meant “holiday” in Nepali.

It was an easy mistake for a foreigner to make. After all, there were balloon carts on the street, along with ice cream and cotton candy vendors. Everyone seemed happy and relaxed and children were playing in the middle of the road while their fathers were playing carrom board on the side. There was an eerie quite in town and the air was clear and diesel free.

At least in some places in America, there will be an improvement as more Nepalis move in and restore America to what it once was: Laundry hanging on the rooftops and children playing in the streets.

So, for years, I thought these labor strikes were national holidays of some sort, and I grew to appreciate the extra days off, along with neighbors and friends.

And even as I began to understand the meaning of banda, my initial thoughts remained the same: Time off. Downtime. Time to reconnect with family and friends, even if fresh bread and milk was not delivered, or you could not get petro at the pump.

Now call me crazy kuire, but in a democracy it seems that groups have a right to burn a tire or shut down public transportation when the need arises. If the public cannot raise their voices in protest of an injustice, then what are we but sheep being led to slaughter?

I remember a time (back in the US) when people were just this way: Vocal about injustice. When the government went to nutty war, college campuses would erupt in protest. When teachers’ salaries were about to be slashed again, schools would be shut and picket lines formed. And when TV writers wanted more compensation for their hard work, new episodes of the Simpsons were not aired.

Those were the days of democracy in action—days when labor unions and students had a say in the shaping of a Great Nation. Nowadays, American unions are vilified and blamed for everything from massive state budget deficits to pedophilia in the school systems. And the police stun students who speak out of turn on public campuses almost instantly: “Please don’t tase me, bro!!!”

So these are indeed all signs that perhaps Opposite Day should have a holiday of its own, and inaugurated on the traditional calendar. On this day, all things that went this way, but now go that way, could be commemorated and celebrated.

For example, when dangerous prisoners are released from California state prisons early, and the Gubernator of that great state declares that this will reduce crime—that becomes a line item on the Opposite Day celebration.

When the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change declares that all Himalayan glaciers will melt by 2035, but then says “oops” they miscalculated (and don’t worry the rest of the data is correct), that also becomes a point to remark on Opposite Day.

And when the government of the New Nepal declares tax victory over the planned opening of KFC and Pizza Hut in Jawalakhel, this is another reason to celebrate Opposite Day, especially if you are a dentist or a pharmacist.

So with all of this in mind, here is what I propose: That Opposite Day be celebrated in conjunction with April Fools’ Day, on April 1 of each year. In joining the two, we can perhaps raise awareness and be dismissed both at the same time, instead of waiting for our desires and demands to be dismissed over the course of the upcoming year.

As it does seem that the voice of the people and actions of government stand completely opposite of each other. Don’t you agree?

(Writer is quirky-kinda expat happily living in the Kathmandu valley with Nepali family, friends, and a very large dog.)

herojig@gmail.com