In writing this blog, I did not know where to begin. How does one convince a crowd full of people that what we normally associate with violence against women, domestic violence, rape, and molestation/incest, is only one part of a broader continuum of violence that also encompasses seemingly small things such as cat calls and harassment, and that all must be fought? How do I show that violence against women is motivated by sexism? That it creates a world in which it is acceptable to use violence against women in order to oppress them, a world in which you become a target because you are a woman, and a world where women and girls live with the possibility of that violence every day. But it is not just physical abuse and rape that I am talking about, violence against women is all of the seemingly "small" acts of violence that take place everyday that contribute to an atmosphere and culture that degrades and dis-empowers girls and women.
I grew up being aware of violence against women from a very young age, my mother helped to co-found and is the co-director of the Women’s Coalition of St. Croix, an organization that helps victims of domestic violence, rape and families in crisis. So, the knowledge of women abuse was very close to me. I knew that every minute women were being beaten, and every night women and children were afraid in their homes. I knew that girls my age and of all ages were raped, being raped or would be raped. And I knew that I was LUCKY, at having survived childhood and adolescence without being the victim of incest or consistent sexual abuse. Only LUCKY.
I knew that when I was five years old and my neighbor and her children were staying at my house, in order to escape from her abusive husband at 3am the next morning on a plane off the island that the reason why they were leaving was scary and dangerous, but the fact that they were able to leave was at once revolutionary and hopeful.
I knew that violence against women was a societal problem, not just a few random acts here and there. That it was not just a few girls and women who were being violated in small and large ways, not just young girls, not just US girls and women, not just white women, but all women and girls no matter where they were.
Why was it that I didn’t know one girl or woman who was not taken advantage of, harassed or abused?
I had stories. My friends had stories, their friends had stories, their mothers had stories, their sisters had stories, and I’m sure every woman and girl here does as well. Hundreds and thousands of stories. Stories of men crossing the line, making them feel uncomfortable, strangers commenting on their bodies, times when they were silenced, times when they could not even find their own voice.
28 women and girls fall victim to domestic violence during 16 d...
But it was more than that, it was the violence of oppression on a broader scale. It wasn’t just that women were being silenced through sexism and still are, but it was also that people of color were being silenced through racism. the queer community was being silenced through homophobia, poor people were being silenced through classism. disabled people were being silenced through abelism, people from other countries were being silenced through our ethnocenricism, and so on. The thinking behind all of the many different forms that the violence or oppression took on was the same. Not only that, but violence against women and sexism, can be made up of all these things as well: racism, homophobia, classism.
For my self, like many other women and girls, violence against women aimed at me can, for instance, take the form of my race or (dis)ability being sexualized, the harassment I face is one where sexism and racism often times go hand in hand and to fight only one would still leave me violated. Because sexism and racism are made up of the ordinary and extraordinary violence, the everyday and extreme violence, and that violence, no matter what form it takes, is used to serve the same purpose: to silence, to disadvantage, to disempower, to oppress. This is not just a war against violence against women, it is a war against all violence. For indeed, just as there is violence within rape, there is violence with in privilege, violence within self hatred, violence within hate.
Violence against women is a form of sexism and we cannot end it until we can end sexism. Sexism is a form of oppression and we cannot end it until we end oppression—in all forms.
So what does real equality look like? Equality where any form of oppression and the violence within it are not tolerated and challenged? Where all women and all girls are free from all violence whether it is based on their sex, their race, their culture, class.
In writing this blog, I did not know where to begin. How does one convince a crowd full of people that what we normally associate with violence against women, domestic violence, rape, and molestation/incest, is only one part of a broader continuum of violence that also encompasses seemingly small things such as cat calls and harassment, and that all must be fought? How do I show that violence against women is motivated by sexism? That it creates a world in which it is acceptable to use violence against women in order to oppress them, a world in which you become a target because you are a woman, and a world where women and girls live with the possibility of that violence every day. But it is not just physical abuse and rape that I am talking about, violence against women is all of the seemingly "small" acts of violence that take place everyday that contribute to an atmosphere and culture that degrades and dis-empowers girls and women.
I grew up being aware of violence against women from a very young age, my mother helped to co-found and is the co-director of the Women’s Coalition of St. Croix, an organization that helps victims of domestic violence, rape and families in crisis. So, the knowledge of women abuse was very close to me. I knew that every minute women were being beaten, and every night women and children were afraid in their homes. I knew that girls my age and of all ages were raped, being raped or would be raped. And I knew that I was LUCKY, at having survived childhood and adolescence without being the victim of incest or consistent sexual abuse. Only LUCKY.
I knew that when I was five years old and my neighbor and her children were staying at my house, in order to escape from her abusive husband at 3am the next morning on a plane off the island that the reason why they were leaving was scary and dangerous, but the fact that they were able to leave was at once revolutionary and hopeful.
I knew that violence against women was a societal problem, not just a few random acts here and there. That it was not just a few girls and women who were being violated in small and large ways, not just young girls, not just US girls and women, not just white women, but all women and girls no matter where they were.
Why was it that I didn’t know one girl or woman who was not taken advantage of, harassed or abused?
I had stories. My friends had stories, their friends had stories, their mothers had stories, their sisters had stories, and I’m sure every woman and girl here does as well. Hundreds and thousands of stories. Stories of men crossing the line, making them feel uncomfortable, strangers commenting on their bodies, times when they were silenced, times when they could not even find their own voice.
But it was more than that, it was the violence of oppression on a broader scale. It wasn’t just that women were being silenced through sexism and still are, but it was also that people of color were being silenced through racism. the queer community was being silenced through homophobia, poor people were being silenced through classism. disabled people were being silenced through abelism, people from other countries were being silenced through our ethnocenricism, and so on. The thinking behind all of the many different forms that the violence or oppression took on was the same. Not only that, but violence against women and sexism, can be made up of all these things as well: racism, homophobia, classism.
For my self, like many other women and girls, violence against women aimed at me can, for instance, take the form of my race or (dis)ability being sexualized, the harassment I face is one where sexism and racism often times go hand in hand and to fight only one would still leave me violated. Because sexism and racism are made up of the ordinary and extraordinary violence, the everyday and extreme violence, and that violence, no matter what form it takes, is used to serve the same purpose: to silence, to disadvantage, to disempower, to oppress. This is not just a war against violence against women, it is a war against all violence. For indeed, just as there is violence within rape, there is violence with in privilege, violence within self hatred, violence within hate.
Violence against women is a form of sexism and we cannot end it until we can end sexism. Sexism is a form of oppression and we cannot end it until we end oppression—in all forms.
So what does real equality look like? Equality where any form of oppression and the violence within it are not tolerated and challenged? Where all women and all girls are free from all violence whether it is based on their sex, their race, their culture, class.
