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Published On: October 10, 2018 10:56 AM NPT By: Republica

You are the captain of your boat

You are the captain of your boat

Dear Sadichha,
I live and study in Melbourne. My father took a loan to send me here. As I am living alone, life is very hard to sustain. I work more than studying. Sometimes, I think I am defying my father’s debt, which led me to this foreign land. I work at a restaurant where; I work all day and my daily life has been depressing. However, I haven’t told my father what I do. He thinks I am working in a business corporation. I want to help my father clear his debt but I don’t even have money for rent. I can’t ask him for more money now knowing about the situation. Please tell me what to do.

Studying abroad is neither cheap nor easy. I know you are working hard to even live and pay rent there. However, you have to find a balance between work and studies. If the job that you are doing currently doesn’t pay well and isn’t enough even for your rent then I suggest you look for other jobs that will be able to help you better. But do not skip school. Make sure that you are focused on the main reason you went there. Don’t worry about the loan that your dad took, I am sure there is time to pay that off. For now, look for jobs that will help you become more financially stable. Finish your studies on time as well. Working in a restaurant isn’t bad, many people work in restaurants and earn from tips, but if that job isn’t paying you well, maybe you can also start looking for jobs according to the subject you are studying. If there are any openings for part-time work in the field of study, go for it. This will also be helpful for you when you want to look for a full-time job after your studies are over. 

Dear Sadichha, 
I am a 20-year-old guy. I am in relation with my former classmate. She is 19. Our relationship was going good and we both were happy with each other. But last week she said that she was pregnant and she wanted to abort the baby. I don’t know what I should do. When I tried to talk with her, she said she just wants to abort it. I am scared and cannot talk to my parents about the situation. Can you please suggest us what we should do because this condition is bothering our career as well.

First of all, you should have used protection. Keep in mind to always practice safe sex in the future. In my opinion, I think both of you are very young to be pregnant and to decide on something as aborting a baby. Do you know how many weeks she is in? Please do consult a good doctor. Do not take this decision alone and do not do it in an unsafe manner. The life of the mother can be at risk. So, gather up some courage and tell your parents about it. Get an adult involved. If the girl really wants to abort the baby, make sure a doctor is consulted and proper ways are followed and done on time. There might be many complications if you do it later, so take a quick decision as to what to do next. I cannot emphasize more on consulting a doctor. This will not be easy or cheap. So be ready and mentally prepare yourself. I highly urge you to talk to your parents and if you can ask your girl to let her family know about it too. 

Dear Sadichha, 
I come from a strict family where I cannot even express my love to my loved ones. My family on the other side has already chosen a guy for me without my consent. He is a son of a family friend. However, I am in love with a guy. My parents are strictly against our relationship. They want me to marry the guy they have chosen for me. I really love my boyfriend. What do I do now?

Try to talk to your parents. Ask them why are they against your relationship. Explain to them why you love him and why he is the right guy for you. Communication is the key when it comes to getting your point across. I also hope that the guy loves you equally and his family also accepts you and the relationship. You can also have the guy meet your parents. Maybe when they see him face-to-face, they will get to know him personally. They might have a different opinion about him. If both of you are really confident about the bond that you share, you can overcome these challenges in a better way. Your parents cannot forcibly marry you off to another guy. They must be worried like any other parents but marrying you off to somebody you don’t like while you are in love with someone else is not right. It’s your future that they are worried about. So, if you talk to them and show them that you have a great future with this guy, then I don’t think they will have an issue. 

Dear Sadichha,
I am a 23-year-old struggling gig artist from Thamel. I had a band and we used to have people come to listen at our gig. Now, every band members have gone to foreign countries.  I am left alone, as a solo artist in the capital. I still do gigs but the situation is not like before. There are not many people as before. I have thought of quitting the music because people don’t show up like they used to. I am in a dilemma now. Please help me out.

Firstly, you have to answer a few questions, why are you doing music? Is it because of the passion you have or for money? If you are doing it for the money then even if it is a house full show or a show with very few people, you are still going to do it because you need the money. However, if you are doing it for the passion, I can understand your frustration. One practical suggestion I can give you is it to promote your events through social media. Posting about your next gigs or collaborating with other artists might also attract more crowd. Don’t be disheartened, many people want to do music but aren’t talented.

 

Send your questions to gennext@myrepublica.com or mycity@myrepublica.com with the subject line “Gennext-Heart to Heart with Sadichha” or post it on our facebook page at facebook.com/gennextnepal.


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