What is Happiness?

What is happiness for you? Just take a moment and think for a while.

What was the first thing that struck your mind? Was it your family? Your career? Money? or your health? I know most of us will still have this debate that money can buy happiness or not. Half of us are going to say that we can earn money when our health is at its best and half of us will say that we are able to be healthy, only when we have the money to maintain our health.

Yes both perspectives are true! So what is real happiness then? Being able to buy anything without looking at the price tag? Or being able to get in touch with any family member without any hesitation?(ugh…did I just pierce your heart?, my bad). Actually we don’t know what kind of happiness are we searching for? We need everything. We want that house, that job position, that perfect spouse who gives you a beautiful surprise frequently, the insta-perfect photograph, matching shoes, matching watch, the newly launched car, what else? The list goes on.

Now let’s think for a moment. Does those materials really matter? How many of you had good conversation with your family recently? Yeah I know here are some of us belonging to families with broken relationships. Some of us have already lost one / both of the parents and are juggling with life. We often spent our time just thinking about our loved ones and the time that we had spent together. Some of us might be tolerating the toxic behavior of step mom/dad. So home or family might not be the source of happiness for us. However here are also some of us who were raised in the institutional homes and did not get chance to know who our parents were. For us, it’s a dream to have a family, to have dinner together and to celebrate occasions together. So for us, the biggest void in our life would be the family.

So what is happiness for all us? Do we care about our bank balance or we wish for a friend or family member with whom we could have shared about our day while having dinner? Is there anyone to celebrate your accomplishment or do you have a shoulder to cry your heart out? Can you remember the time when someone asks you about your day? When was the last time you hung out with your friends? Or do you have any friends? Ask yourself! Do you know which plants are there in your kitchen garden? And who planted those? When was the last time you talked with someone about your problems? Or do you ever bother to seek for help? If not, why aren’t you? Is it because there is no-one or is it because you are surrounded by a crowd but full of strangers? We all will have one answer for this, “it’s complicated” ……..period!!!

Well, meaning of happiness varies from person to person. For someone, the family can be the source of their happiness whereas someone might be dealing with the toxic environment of their family and relatives and want to just leave their hometown- while some are compelled to leave their home country to support their family economically. For some of us it is not necessary to hang out with friends and party all day long. We just want to stay in our home, rest and read a book. Some of us need a good talk with our loved ones to let out all the mental burden while some just need a day’s break in nature, a trek or just an hour of meditation to recharge ourselves. Some of us might be thriving to achieve our goal and the ultimate goal of ours may be a position or a promotion for which we are working day and night like a donkey. Yeah! You heard it right like a donkey because at the end of the day you are responsible for your efforts and your success. No one is going to do it for you! Hence, we need to respect each other’s’ decisions and life choices. We are not going to be happy with others’ life choices or the way of living. We have our own priorities and needs for which we are working. We don’t know who is dealing with what kind of problem in their life and yes circumstances do compel us to make decisions that we had never ever thought of.

Everyone is trying their best to deal with their life circumstances and finding happiness within their surroundings. And yes, happiness does not have any definition! It can be created within us and we do not need any validation from others. If it makes us happy just by sitting at our home then it is happiness for some of us, if are we ok with our 9-5 job rather going to a long field work then that is happiness for some of us and yeah making several round trips for office work, delving into different culture is giving happiness then that is also fine. Meaning of happiness is different for all. Someone’s reason for happiness might be someone’s most hatred thing. We are as unique as our finger prints and there is no need to take the validation of our happiness from anyone. We are the drivers of our journey and we have our own chosen path. So if someone is trying their best to put their life together, let’s support them rather than throwing our belief of real happiness and stop poking our nose in others’ business.

Let’s live and also let others to live in their own way.