It is now fourteen years since Yagya Lal Subedi, 38 and Malati Subedi, 33 tied the knots and although an arranged marriage, both agree, “It was love at first sight and our love for each other continues to mature with time.”
The Subedi couple originally come from Murgaya in Butwal where they owned a general store. Today, they run a small canteen in Anam Nagar and have their quarters nearby.
“We first arrived in Kathmandu five years ago after a mutual agreement and have been running the canteen since then,” Yagya says as he kneads a lump of tobacco in his palm.
On weekdays, when there is a rush, many frequent the little canteen behind APCA House’s parking lot and right from 6 a.m. to 9 p.m., the Subedi couple can be seen working in tandem.
“It is a tedious job but we help each other out in our household and canteen chores,” says Malati as her husbands totes up the accounts of the day.
No doubt, canteen business is as tedious as Malati puts it and equally challenging is to cater to the rush. Simultaneous cooking, serving, getting the bills right and keeping customers happy on a daily basis is no child’s play and they also have a son and daughter to take care of.
With so many chores keeping them busy, one might wonder if the Subedi couple has time for themselves as they hit the sack at 10 p.m. after a spell with the TV and talks basically revolving around work, savings, general upsets and happiness.
But talk about love and one could be amused how the Subedi couple beams with happiness. “I surprise her with Gundpaak,” Yagya says beating his shyness with the lump of tobacco in his lower jaw, “She just loves it. She is crazy about sweets.”
A sweet tooth Malati sure has and she shares how each Saturday the couple along with their children end up in a sweet shop for ‘chaat’ and rasbari at Bhotahity after their shopping and a week’s catching up with each other.
She then recalls, “While shopping for the canteen, he also insists on buying whatever I like and even in Butwal, when he used to take me out for movies, he would get me chips and drinks, which was really sweet of him. Now, our priorities have changed. We have children to take care of and visit to a cinema is rare these days.”
“She gets me clothes. All of them,” a proud Yagya then reveals, his shyness now evaporated. “Even the ones I wear now,” he says adjusting his jacket collar, “She does all the shopping for me and I love what she gets for me.”
A joyful Malati taunts, “You don’t know how to buy clothes. In fact you don’t know the ABCs of shopping. I choose all his clothes.” The couple breaks into laughter.
“It was five to seven months ago,” Yagya recalls, “It was usual rush in the canteen and our phone rang. Malati received the phone and the person at the other end (her father) inquired ‘ke cha?’ (Literally ‘what’s up’ but in the canteen’s context, ‘what’s on the menu?’). And to her father’s amusement, Malati responded, “aloo, chana, chowmein… (Potatoes, gram, spaghetti…)”
“We laughed our heart out,” he adds and both laugh again. “Of course business is a priority but she could have excused herself for a while and catch up with her father but she put the phone down and I really felt strongly for her,” he says.
“And you sleep like a log,” Malati adds, “Prior to our marriage; I had heard that he’s a big time sleeper. To such an extent that his neighbors had to come and wake him up after the smell of the lentils overcooking wafted across the neighbourhood. (laughs) But back then, he used to work night shifts so I really felt sad for him.”
As the couple discovers love in little things that make up their lives, Yagya’s eyes sparkle while Malati flashes all her teeth.
Seeing the Subedis laugh and smile at each other one cannot help but be touched. Their aura and their world supersede that of a privileged society full of frictions and fabricated relationships.
“We have plans for a family outing this February 14 but not because it’s Valentine’s Day. Saturday is the only day our family can be together and this is our idea of love,” says Malati, “Love is not just something that you have between couples rather it is the care and attention that you give to everyone.”
“Love, basically is all about caring,” Yagya adds, “It is help that you offer and actions speak louder then words. Just fooling around verbally can’t be love. That’s infatuation.”
Unreported Lives is a weekly column for stories of ordinary people and their daily lives which often go unnoticed. Suggestions and feedback are welcome.
arpan@myrepublica.com
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