Dear Sadichha,

I am a 28-year-old woman and a nurse by profession. Few weeks ago, my family saw a guy for me. He is an NRN settled in the US which means that I have to move with him if we get married. I have built my career with a good set of experience here in the field. I also have my family and friends here which makes me have many questions whether to give this arranged relationship a chance. I am uncertain on what to do.

Don’t think about all these questions without even meeting the guy. I feel like meeting and getting to know a new person cannot be that bad. Only when you meet him will you know the kind of person he is and if you would even consider getting married to him.  If the two of you don’t click and don’t think the same way then there is nothing to worry about as there will be no talks about marriage if you don’t like him. However, if you do like him and feel like you might consider moving forward then you can evaluate and weigh in on the various factors you mentioned. Moving to a new place has its own pros and cons. There is always family and friends who can be in your life even when miles away, thanks to technology. You are a nurse by profession and I am sure you will be able to continue working in that sector even if you decide to shift to the US. So, the first step can be meeting the guy and then getting to know him and the kind of person he is.

Dear Sadichha,

I am a 23-year-old and the only daughter of my parents. They have quite a high expectation from me. I have been an obedient daughter throughout my life and have been a responsible person. Like every child, I share a deep bonding with my parents. But recently they have problem with a girl that I am dating as she doesn't belong to the same caste and culture that I do. I find myself in trouble now. How do is solve it?

Your parents are okay with you dating a girl and not okay with the girl not being of the same caste and culture? I don’t know if I should consider them to be modern or conservative? If the bond that you share with them like you say is deep then I am sure they will understand where you are coming from. You don’t have to be guilty of being in love with someone. Communicate with your parents and understand on why they do not like her. Maybe there is more than just what you might think. They might be worried about other things but are not finding the right way to explain that to you. So, communicate effectively with them. I can understand the weight of wanting to be a good daughter and trying not to hurt your parents so it is with a little experience that I tell you to not be stressed. Our parents love us unconditionally and always want the best for us. So, even though they might take time to understand sometimes, they will do so gradually.

Dear Sadichha,

I am a 24-year-old girl. I am in a relationship with a guy for the past three years now. In these years, we got to know each other better. But since we got busy in our works, we could not meet as much as we did in the past. Recently I met a guy who was into me. We talked about each other and I let him know that I was in a relationship so that he doesn't get misinterpreted in any way. My boyfriend was getting insecure thinking that this new guy was taking his space. I tried to clarify but he wants me to stop talking to him now. I don't want myself to be restricted as I know my choices and what is best for me. Am I being too modern or is he being too conservative?

I think you are standing up for yourself. I don’t think anybody can tell anyone what to do or what not to do specially something as silly as “Don’t talk to him”. Your boyfriend is being insecure of course but if there is no reason for him to be insecure then he should not act that way. I also feel like it’s not about how many times you meet but how those meetings go. More than quantity it’s the quality. If you have heart-to-heart conversations and spend quality time together once in a while, then you don’t even need to see each other every day. However, you need to make an effort for the relationship to grow stronger. Have a conversation with a cool mind, go out for a getaway to reconnect and value the relationship that you share. If both of you feel the same way about each other, then there is no need for restrictions or clarifications.

Dear Sadichha,

I am a 20-year-old guy. I am taking a break from studies for now. I studied business in my high school and I was planning to join business school abroad. I had applied for a visa but it got rejected. I am currently working in one of the magazines and lately I have wanted to shift my focus and career in writing. Is that a mature decision to take or am I just being carried away by the work I do?

I will not be able to say if you are being carried away or if it’s a mature decision. However, I will encourage you to take this step. You can definitely explore this area and see how well you do in it or how it makes you feel. Maybe it gives you more happiness than studying business. This step will also help you evaluate where you would like to head towards. I feel like you should live your life in a way where you don’t ever need to ask “what if”.  If you start writing and like it then you can definitely start and shift your career path towards it. However, if it doesn’t roll out the way you want it to, then you can always explore other areas or even start with your business school path by applying to other universities and schools. If you would like to do both, I feel like you can. There are many working professionals who also contribute as writers and are even authors. Maybe you can have the best of both worlds too.