Our head of state was unfortunate to be caught up in the perfect storm: a combination of our patriarchal culture, the inscrutability of our religion, and the vagaries of national politics all contriving to aggravate the situation and leave an unpleasant aftertaste to her visit. The anger that was directed at her position of authority is understandable given the less than cordial relations between the state – symbolized by the 'pahade' leadership – and its Tarai inhabitants. It was, however, alarming to witness all that political anger degenerate into distasteful objections centered on the themes of gender and marital status.
The fact that the cleansing was attributed to the presence of leather shoes and dogs in the temple is laughable to say the least. The security in there must have greatly improved because there certainly wasn't a shortage of stray dogs or leather wearing worshippers (minus shoes) the last time I was there. It's not surprising then, that the actual reason for the 'cleansing' is religious in nature. I don't claim to be well versed in religion – on occasion I've even been accused of not living up to my surname – but there is absolutely no reason, going by either written word or precedent that bars a widow from entering a temple on 'Bibaha Panchami'.
Our religion, more than others, has a huge 'make it up as you go along' component and when this is allied to its countless interpretations, exceptions, and compulsions, it becomes all too easy for anyone to claim something as an affront to their religious values. There is a certain flexibility to our religious principles and their practice making it susceptible to manipulation by priests – not unlike what a good lawyer can do with written laws. Tell me something that is set in stone and I'll find you a priest that can change it for the right amount. It's not a boast, just the way it works.
As is the case with any issue these days, there was a buzz on social media with a fair few people distancing themselves from this 'sick' mentality which they claimed as being unrepresentative of Nepal. Which Nepal? On the one hand, we have been suffering for months on end in order to retain those territories, resisting what our politicians say is the alleged grand design of India to annex our southern belt and even amending our constitution to give 'them' greater representation. And then on the other hand, we are quick to disown the mentality of the people who live 'there'. Sure, it might not be representative of the educated urban populace but our demographic makes up a miniscule percentage of the nation's population.The fact is that 'mentality' is a part of Nepal and an outcome of our patriarchal culture (and religion) which is just as entrenched in the mountains as it is in the lowlands.
This patriarchy sees widows as impure or a bad omen and widows are less than welcome whilst celebrating or starting anything auspicious. They are expected to wear white (not applicable to widowers), expected not to have any color or fun in life, and the option of remarriage is still taboo for many. The end result is that their entire existence is tied to that of their non-existent husband.
This second class treatment is a reality not just for widows but for all women in every aspect of national life – from cultural ('chaupadi pratha') to political (citizenship issues), social (set gender roles) and religious aspects as embodied by the current flare up in Janakpur. This is certainly not exclusive to the hills or the plains, so it's not just 'they' who need to cleanse their thoughts but the whole country that is in need of some mental scrubbing.
Our lawmakers are selectively outraged at this 'mistreatment' but would have been unsurprisingly mum if it had happened to a 'lesser' being because we always pick and choose the women we fight for. This current status quo is exactly why I (unlike many) think that the appointment of Mrs BDB wasn't something to really shout about. For a country apparently cursed by 'sati' a long time ago, it's a matter of shame that we still won't do anything to prevent history repeating itself on a daily basis. We really don't need any more curses. We've got enough to deal with already.
gunjan.u@gmail.com
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