According to Angfinjo Sherpa of Solukhumbu, who is studying Sherpa marriage culture, Sherpas are quite strict about not arranging marriages within the same caste. There are four castes in the community – Mingyakpa, Chyawa, Thimi and Lama. "Since the boys and girls of the same caste are considered as brothers and sisters, their marriage is not acceptable to the society," said Angfinjo.
Elders in the Sherpa community first try to find out whether the bride and groom suit each other or not. For this, they go through all sorts of numerical or astrological predictions to get an idea about the compatibility between the two. If the elders in the families are sure of positive results, they proceed further.
The Boy's family then asks for the girl's hand in a formal way – by offering typical liquor called 'Chhyang' and other special dishes. If the elders from the girl's family are happy about it, they accept the offerings or else deny the proposal.
Whether it is marriage or other ceremonies, Sherpas include their ancestral deity in all the events. Without special puja for the deities, they hardly carry out their cultural functions. Traditional Mongolian attire for the couple and invitees is a must during marriage. After marriage between couple is declared amid a function, the bride is taken to the groom's house. The culture of offering dowry exists in Sherpa culture as well. However, such gifts are given to the family of the groom after days or even years post the wedding. However, the marriage culture of this community differs depending on the regions.
According to Angfinjo, in the Khumbu region, couples do not have to necessarily complete the marriage rituals in order to start living together. As soon as their marriage is fixed by the elders, they start living together. "The actual marriage might take place after years of living together," he said.
Translated from Nepali by Anjali Subedi
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