CILLA KHATRY
Let me start by admitting that I have many, many flaws. And of the countless bad habits that have by now become an extension of me, the one that drives Aama up the wall is the fact that I’m very unsocial.[break]
I always tried to pacify her by giving justifications for my behavior and reasoning out that I didn’t believe in meddling in other people’s affairs and was at my happiest best when left to my own devices.
Her argument was always the same – that we are, and I quote, “social animals” and need an extended circle of family and friends as much as I would like to believe otherwise. It was difficult to make her see why I was content with having a limited number of close friends and chose to be in touch with only a handful of our many relatives.
Being an extremist, I would either like someone wholeheartedly or despise him/her with equal fervor. The in-between ones were the people I never bothered with. Of course, Aama being the “social animal” that she is, could never understand.
Having always been a rebellious character, no amount of logic from my parents ever did me any good. I shunned social gatherings like plague, stayed away from the phone when it rang just so I didn’t have to exchange weird pleasantries with some relative whose face I couldn’t recall and even feigned illness and pretended to be asleep when I didn’t want to say hello to someone who was paying a visit.
Then, quite recently, a relative was diagnosed with brain tumor. She survived the operation and recovered pretty well. The surgery came with a fair share of side effects though, and she was unable to walk or talk much. Yet she used to call up Aama.
There were times when I answered the phone and passed it on in a rush because I didn’t want to speak to her as her speech was slurry, and it took a lot of effort to understand what she was saying.
Then, a few days back, she fell sick and her condition started deteriorating day by day. For a few days, I didn’t even visit her at the hospital where she was admitted; and when I eventually got around to, I refused to enter her room – mainly because seeing her bedridden brought back painful memories of having lost a very close relative to cancer but also because I didn’t want to chitchat with the other relatives who were constantly around her.
Eventually, when I stood motionless by her bed, she reached out to hold my hand and then smiled and tried to speak to me. That particular moment, when I stood holding her frail and trembling hand, was when I regretted all those times when I could have but chose not to speak to her much.
It made me regret all the times when I was being me when I could’ve been someone a bit nicer. As clichéd as it may sound, life’s too short to wake up with regrets. But that’s precisely what I do now.
Granted that not everybody is important in your life, but people matter and you just have to try and put in a little extra effort even if you’re as “unsocial” as me. The point isn’t about being unfailingly polite but being nice enough so that you don’t drown in regrets one day.
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Movie experience: Watching Highway
NISTHA RAYAMAJHI
The fact that our movie theatres didn’t put up movies that were not mainstream or commercial always disappointed me. Being someone who loves watching movies, I always had an interest in movies that are more realistic and which make me think even after the show is over. Since such movies would be put up rarely, I would usually depend on the DVDs instead.
So when I saw the trailer of the Nepali movie “Highway,” I couldn’t wait to watch it because it felt like it would be something different. The sneak peek of how the story would unfold made it all the more interesting.
I’ve hardly watched Nepali movies but I was eagerly waiting for this one as from what I heard and saw it felt like it wouldn’t be like any other Nepali commercial films.
It had been years since I had watched morning shows at the movie theatres. So my bunch of friends and I decided to go for one. We were right in time, but to our dismay the show wasn’t starting until 12 noon.
Surprisingly, the timing that we had seen on the theatre website was incorrect and so it meant that we had to wait a few more hours for it. My wait for the movie indeed seemed longer than I had imagined.
When the show finally started, I was pretty much impressed by how it all went. I don’t know much about technical aspects, but I felt that the movie was well edited with no superfluous scenes.
The movie did turn out as what I had expected, as it follows the unconventional trend which is rarely seen in our Nepali cinema. There was this Nepali movie I remember which was quite hyped up for using modern concepts but it turned out to be nothing more than a clichéd drama.
But “Highway,” I believe, is a good break from the stereotype movies and has set a benchmark. It has brought to light the realistic aspects of life and has interconnected various social issues quite well. I hope this movie will encourage and inspire more filmmakers to realize that a good plot can really pay off.
I’ve heard that the movie has garnered quite a lot of both positive and negative comments. I personally found the story gripping. It’s always good to hear the reviews of others before watching a movie. But I guess it’s always better if you see and decide for yourself.
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On Kathmandu´s roads
ASMITA MANANDHAR
In front of Bir Hospital, a woman was talking on the phone, standing slightly off the sidewalk, when suddenly a bike hit her from behind. The woman fell hard on the road, the two-wheeler stopped with loud screeching brakes and people around the place froze before some ran towards the incident.
Accidents like this on the roads of Kathmandu have become a daily dose of sights. And the number has increased so much that it’s not even news anymore. A YouTube video of a bike being run down by a public bus and recorded by the traffic CCTV camera at New Baneshwor Chowk explains the appalling evidence of the driving habits on the roads of Kathmandu.
A rookie on the road, I’m constantly under pressure and I always feel tense while I’m driving. Rules followed to the minimum, people somehow have an immediate urgency when they are on the roads. They can’t stop themselves from honking continuously and the urge to overtake every single vehicle in front seems on the mind of every driver’s mind.
There seems to be a competition among drivers to jump the lane and accelerate faster, regardless of the consequences. There’s no courtesy at all among the vehicle drivers and definitely not at all for pedestrians. And there’s also the culture of not letting the other overtake you even though you’re creating traffic congestion.
One friend told me that nobody in her house is allowed to drive a two-wheeler. After a neighbor met with an accident and lost both of her legs, bikes and scooters were not only no-no in her household but in the entire neighborhood too.
Now that I have vehicles swerving and zooming from both sides when I’m riding my scooty, I understand why parents are scared to such an extent. It seems like you can have an accident any moment you’re on the road. I may be exaggerating and this may be a rookie anxiety, too. But for me, the riding experience on the roads of Kathmandu is overwhelming.
And I wonder why is the system so mismanaged and chaotic. Why are drivers rude to their fellow drivers and have no minimum road sense. Then I look at our culture where it’s actually difficult for us to even stand in a queue out of our good sense. We exercise much less discipline in public and likewise on the road.
After a while, I, too, may adjust well to the roads. The inappropriate honks and swerves of the vehicles may be of less concern to me. Or maybe, I’ll be one of the honking and veering drivers anyway.
Survival of the fittest, isn’t it?
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