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Sex education after age old tradition of bael bihe

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BAGLUNG, June 8: Wearing a red sari, lipstick and sindoor on her forehead, class one student Nasiwa Shrestha is sitting on the mandap. A resident of Baglung bazaar, Nasiwa is being looked after by her father, Nirman Kumar Shrestha.



Nine-year-old Anusupa Shrestha is looking equally pretty. Nasiwa’s mother Poonam is doing her daughter’s make-up. The women in the Newar community were competing to ensure that their daughter looked beautiful and the young girls looked pretty in their finery and make up. They were all getting married. Not to a boy, but to the Bael fruit. This is an old tradition in the Newar culture.[break]



There’s a lot of activity in the temple at Narayan Chowk in Baglung Bazaar. The Newar pundit from Kathmandu, Hari Om Raj Upadhyay, is busy uttering mantras as well arranging the materials for the puja.



Ten young girls between the ages of five to 10 have become brides together and their mothers are occupied with the wedding arrangements. The young girls are happy despite this being their wedding day. Organized by Nepal Bhasa Manka Khala, Baglung, the ceremony looked like a real wedding.







According to the Newar tradition, young girls are married to Bael, which is the symbol of Subarna Kumar. The fruit is considered to be without any flaw and if a young girl gets married to it before her menstruation starts, she will never be considered a divorcee or a widow according to the religion.



It’s a custom to hold the wedding collectively, says Mahesh Chandra Pradhan, Chairman of Nepal Bhasa Manka Khala, Baglung. “If done separately it costs more and since we organize it once a year, we do it together,” says Pradhan.



200 different varieties of things are required for the wedding and it’s deemed to be difficult task. A woman carries the sindoor during the wedding, and it is the pundit’s wife who puts the sindoor on the girls.



This is an old tradition. Pradhan says that it started from1989 BS and it was since 2050 BS that the joint wedding was organized each year in Baglung. The ceremony is a three day long process. It starts with duswa (purwadanga) and the second day is kanyadan. Samapan (chaturthi) takes place on the last day. Each day the girls are brought to the mandap and they participate in the wedding process. On the last day, the brides are taken around Baglung Bazaar and brought back to the house as a bride, informs Mukesh Chandra Rajbhandari, Secretary of Nepal Bhasa Manka Khala.



“Even though the country is secular, the Newar community has continued to keep their tradition alive,” says Rajbhandari.



12 days sex education

After the ceremony is completed, the young girls are kept in a dark room for 12 days and taught sex education.



Marrying the Bael indicates that a child has become a young girl. During the 12 days, the girls learn about the physical changes they will go through during adolescence and also the cultural responsibilities.



Dhaulagiri Multiple Campus’s principal Pramila Rajbhandari says that the young girls are taught by a female guardian for 12 days. They learn about menstruation, about why it happens, the changes it brings to their bodies and how to keep oneself clean. The girls are kept in a dark room where no sunlight can enter and this is done to prepare them when they start their menstruation says Rajbhandari.



The girls learn about the development in their private parts as well as the change in their voice after menstruation. They also learn that they need to keep themselves safe from men.



The guardian also informs them about married life and bearing children into the world. In this occasion, the girls learn to sing and dance and due to the absence of male members, the women enjoy it without any restrictions.



“Once a daughter grows up, the society will notice her every move,” says Rajbhandari, “Giving them awareness lessons early in life can make them aware and escape any probable dangers.”



Since it is only women who take the classes, the girls can ask any question without hesitation. Along with sex education, they get religious, cultural and behavioral lessons, puts Chairman Mahesh Chandra Pradhan.



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