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When you are in a relationship, you should feel free to confess and talk about any subject with your partner without the fear of being judged. In fact, having open and honest communication with your partner only helps to strengthen the foundation of the relationship. However, asking certain questions, especially the ones related to the past of your lover, can have a negative impact on your relationship and can make both of you uncomfortable. What are those? Here are some questions you should think twice before asking.
1.Are you sure you are telling me the truth?
Asking this question can do more harm than good to your relationship. First of all, it indicates that you might be feeling insecure and have trust issues in the relationship. Secondly, you will always overthink and struggle to figure out whether you should trust your partner’s answer or not. Lastly, would you like if your lover asked you the same question? It is always wiser to openly discuss the issues that are bothering you. It would eventually help to build trust and intimacy in your relationship, and save you from getting stressed over little things.
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2.Why are you the one who is always at fault?
Remember, playing any kind of blame games with your partner is really unhealthy for your relationship. Accusing your lover for always being at fault or negatively judging him or her can indicate resentment and make your partner overreact to the situation or get defensive. Instead of blatantly uttering anything, try sharing how you feel and what can be done to improve the situation. It is okay to talk about your partner’s behavioural traits or habits that annoy you but do not forget to appreciate whenever they do something to comfort or make you feel special.
3.Why can’t you just relax?
If you have been noticing changes in your partner’s behaviour lately or see him overreacting or stressing over minute things, simply asking your partner to relax won’t solve the problem. There could be multiple reasons that could be making your partner upset and you might have no idea about them. You can be a more supportive and caring partner by understanding what your lover is going through and trying to figure out a solution together.
4.Am I better than your ex-partner?
Comparing yourself to anyone, especially your partner’s ex, is a recipe for disaster. Pointlessly talking about your spouse’s past would make him or her feel uncomfortable and confused about what to say. In fact, asking this question indicates that you are not comfortable with your own self and maybe, lack confidence. Also, you might come across as a jealous and possessive partner.
5.With whom you had the best time of your life?
Again bringing up your partner’s past won’t benefit your relationship anyhow. It puts your partner in an embarrassing situation, and would you able to handle your emotions if your partner talks about the memorable, happy moments of his or her previous relationship? If all is well in your paradise, why ruin your peace of mind by asking such questions?
6.Why do you always things I don't like?
Simply blaming your partner for not doing stuff as per your wishes and likings can make him feel demotivated and bogged down. You need to appreciate the efforts your partner is making for the relationship and not expect him to read your mind. If anything annoys you, the key it is to talk it out and not say anything hurtful to your partner.
7.Are you sure you love me?
It is important to feel loved in your relationship but in case you are asking this question to seek any kind of validation from your lover, you are heading on the wrong path. There could be chances that your partner does not spend quality time with you, or you are feeling insecure for no good reason. Rather than abruptly asking this question to your partner, take your time to think about your own feelings and relationship logically and then look for a right opportunity to bring up this topic in front of your lover.