Although Laxmi Adhikari of Purano Chowki in Kaski faces similar social stigmas, she is all determined to prove herself and also contribute to the society.[break]
Who is Laxmi?
The younger of two children, Laxmi lost her father at a young age and grew up under her mother’s care. As she spent her younger years busy in household chores, she was denied education. However, at present, she is seeking adult education.
At 21, after falling in love with fellow villager Raju Adhikari, a cook in Goa in India, she married him. Aware of the casteist fact that the villagers would not accept a marriage between a Brahmin woman and a Chettri man, the couple eloped to Goa.
During their five years in Goa, the couple had two children. Laxmi’s new family was happy despite being distant from their relatives and family members.
However, fate had something else in store for Laxmi. In 2001, Raju fell sick and the hotel owner compelled him to return to his hometown, saying he had tuberculosis (TB). Uneducated Laxmi had no clue that the couple had actually contracted HIV.
Finally accepted by her husband’s family in Pokhara, Laxmi’s struggles began. Raju was taken to Manipal Hospital for medical tests. Laxmi and the children were also tested for HIV. Until then, she was confident that her husband had TB.
However, she became the target of contempt in her village after the blood test report arrived. And Raju’s death nine months later added burdens to her misfortunes. The villagers boycotted Laxmi and her children, saying that they had contracted AIDS.
“They didn’t even allow me to sit in for the last rites of my husband,” remembering the incident that took place seven years ago, Laxmi added, “They called me lazy, and insulted me and my children. They also didn’t allow me to drink water from the well and ignored me on the streets.”
After not being able to tolerate the disrespect for long, Laxmi’s family moved to Pokhara’s outskirts.
A new life
In Pokhara, Laxmi got in touch with several social organizations through her mother-in-law. During her visits to the Community Support Group, an organization which worked in the HIV sector, Laxmi came to know about her disease. And seeing women in similar situation, she built up her courage and increased her visits to the community.
The 35-year-old started working as a social worker in Aashako Sathi after a community member introduced her to it. Apart from being a cook for the organization, she also took care of single women infected with HIV/AIDS. As her network with women like herself grew, she established an organization and became its chairperson.
With the aim of increasing the income of her group, Laxmi rented a property with a house and land in Lekhnath of Sal Danda and registered it as Ankur Single and Infected Women’s Group.
“Due to lack of money, I had to sell my gold ring to register the office,” she recalls the year of 2007.
At present, nine people from different districts like Arghakhanchi, Gorkha, Dhading, and Kaski stay at the rented house. The group is trying to be independent through vegetable farming and goat rearing. Laxmi pays Rs 2,000 a month for the land and house which has been leased for 10 years.
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For Laxmi, who lives with her mother-in-law in Pokhara, Ankur is her second home. Representing her organization, she participates in training programs and conferences, and is active in generating awareness regarding HIV/AIDS. Apart from those engagements, she also bears the responsibility of collecting money to run the group.
However, at present, it is getting difficult for Laxmi to manage the organization.
“Although there are several units and organizations working in this sector, there hasn’t been enough help,” she adds.
To pay the organization’s debt, this mother of two used her award money that she received three months ago. She was awarded the Setilu Maya Smriti Puraskar and Rs 100,000.
“Due to lack of budget, I haven’t been able to add telephone and furniture in the office,” she informs. According to Laxmi, the group’s monthly expenditure is Rs 10,000 and it survives on funds.
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Even though she thought of committing suicide after her husband’s death, she did not have the courage to do so due to her children.
“But for three months, I carried rat poison to kill myself,” She says. She says her husband had AIDS before their marriage, as the children are also HIV-infected. But her maternal home and family, who once mistreated her, are now close to her.
Four years ago, during a public program organized at the Western Regional Hospital, Laxmi made herself public as an HIV-infected person. Even though she clearly knows that due to the disease her death is near, she has dedicated herself to bring changes in the society.
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