Personally, he was as caring a father as a child would need. I remember him showering all his affections on me, be it by playing with me or taking me out on picnics. Picnics were very important part of the family bonding. Sanubuwa took initiative in organizing and participating in all family outings.[break]
That he was a progressive man was evident when he married a divorcee with a child from her former marriage. Sanubuwa loved my mother very dearly. Although their marriage was marred by long separations from time to time, they stood by each other for she was the love of his life. He was a romantic and compassionate man. I admired this particular character about my father a lot.
He was totally a family man, extremely close with his family members. After BP’s death, a lot of family responsibilities fell upon his shoulders. And after Sushma ma’s death, he moved away from the family and devoted much time to politics and started spending more time with party cadres traveling all across the country.
As all know, my mother was a teacher even before my father married her. She did not give up this profession. Many times when Sanubuwa urged her to quit this profession and travel with him, she used to say, “There is no certainty of your work. Nobody knows when you will be behind bars. The children need me”. She chose to be with us rather than travel with him. She died some two months after he was released from the prison. But he made sure that he was beside her death bed when she breathed her last.
He did not directly encourage me to join politics. Neither did he tell me to come back from Germany. He neither asked me join politics, nor did he say don’t. Initially I was not too keen about politics. But certainly I traveled extensively with him almost everywhere he went, inside and outside the country. I went with him as I was his follower and he enjoyed my company. People took our travels very politically. But that was not the truth.
Even though I was in Germany, my heart was in Nepal and with the people. I used to visit Nepal quite frequently, but nobody noticed initially. It was only after the 1990 People’s Movement that political parties and people started noticing. Whenever I came to Kathmandu, I tagged along with him and visited many places, remote corners of the country, even before he became the prime minister. I remember one particular visit to Jajarkot and Salyan when he was party general secretary. I wanted to see how people lived, he took me along. But thanks to the media when he became the prime minister I was brought to limelight.
During Panchayati regime, it was very difficult to travel for my family members. It was like Hitler’s rule in Nepal. At one point, Nepali Congress activists were not even allowed to take part in blood donation organized in the capital. It was a dreadful situation for party leaders, one that we just cannot imagine now.
Sanubuwa had admitted that he made two major blunders in my political career, which were also mistakes for party’s well-being. The first was even when he himself was the party president, NC did not give me election ticket from Dharan and second the party did not let me fight in the Pokhara Convention. I had a good chance in Dharan, but may be he thought senior party leaders would blame him for favoring his daughter. But in Pokhara, more than GPK, the objection came from within the party. Unfortunately, he was convinced by influences emanating from the party. He later said, “Both were mistakes for Sujata and for the party.”
Nonetheless, he had a major role in my political career. He was a guide, philosopher and teacher. I learnt from his will power, his ability to take stand and stick to the stances. I have learnt a lot from him and I feel we must give continuity to his beliefs. He set a vision and in return received a lot of respect and love from the common folks. He was a people’s man and everywhere he went people felt his presence. He had a unique quality – his ability to draw someone close to him.
He loved his family very much. He enjoyed his grand children’s company till the last days. I recently found a letter written by him when Melini (my daughter) was very young. He wrote in the letter: Let me know beforehand when you plan to come to Nepal so that I can keep myself free. He was very happy during Melini’s wedding and when she had her son. He doted on his great grandson.
He made it a point to visit his family members at least in times of tragedy. Like the time he went to meet my brother-in-law, Madhav Sharma, when his wife Kavita Koirala (daughter of Matrika Koirala) died in Switzerland. My brother-in-law called from there after hearing the news of Sanubuwa’s death. He recalled how Sanubuwa flew to his house when his wife died.
In one flight from Germany, I was together with Madhav bhinaju (brother-in-law). He spoke at length about GPK. I had told him then that I know my father. He will prove one day who he is and what he can do! That turned out true. He proved me right by putting into action what he believed in and what he said. Bhinaju reminded me of that chat when he called this time.
Internationally, too, he was well-known. I accompanied him during his trips to Germany, Austria, Finland, Sweden and other European countries, not to forget his meeting with former US president Bill Clinton. In Europe, he mostly interacted with socialist democrats like former German Chancellor, Willy Brandt.
Many of his friends at home and abroad called him political-minded person. There was political connotation to what he did and said. But he was a good person at heart – A simple man with a very big heart. His good qualities over-shadowed his negative side.
Another of his great characteristics was his ability to take criticism very easily and lightly. No doubt he faced enough criticism in his life, but he never cultivated a feeling of revenge against anyone. May be that was because whatever he did was for everybody, for people. Seldom did he not help those who came to him. He even wished good for his foes. I have never known GPK refuting any news item in his entire political life.
He encouraged women’s participation in politics. When women in the valley joined the 1990 movement, he said, “Now the movement is going to be successful. Women have come forward. We will now win.”
He spoke with the Maoists in Delhi as he believed in cooperation and reconciliation. I had for the first time spoken in Delhi after his meeting with the Maoist leaders in Noida in New Delhi that we must move ahead by holding dialogue with the Maoists. The media had then said that GPK was angry with his daughter for having said that. That was not the case. He had immediately spoken in India in the similar line as he had the same intention.
In his last days, he wished for reconciliation and only reconciliation in his last days. He told the party leaders while he was in hospital that the responsibility of writing the constitution has now come upon them. I regret not asking him about the future of High-Level Political Mechanism, otherwise things would now be much clearer. Once I had made a reference when he was at the hospital the last time. But he did not say anything about the Mechanism then and later it was just too late. But I feel there are two ways to take the leadership of the mechanism forward – either it must be led by the Nepali Congress or two parties can jointly head it. GPK was worried about the success of the mechanism.
(As told to Akanshya Shah)
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