Faced with perennial struggle for a dignified existence, do the gender minority feel as grateful to God as the straight ones?
They say they do. “Others might think that we are subhuman or ´immoral´ creatures. However, I feel that the feeling of gratefulness toward God is as deep - or even deeper than -- the straight guys despite the painful life we live,” said Laxmi Ghalan, president of an organization of gender minority - Mitini Nepal. [break]
“We seriously follow all important religious occasions, fast during the scared days, visit temples, and worship deities. A very few people in our community are atheist.”
Laxmi herself is a devout follower of Lord Ganesh. It was Ganasha, she believes, who gave her the courage to have patience and stand firm when her love life was about to collapse 13 years ago.
“After they came to know about our relationship, her family members tortured her to the extent that she decided to end her life by consume poison,” Laxmi says of her partner. “I was just 18 years old and did not know how to handle the situation. I prayed to God to save her life and turn things in our favor.”
Laxmi´s partner Meera Maharjan finally survived, and eloped with her soon after. Interestingly, Meera is even stricter when it comes to observing the religious rituals. The couple follow both Hinduism and Buddhism.
Dev Gurung, a female to male transgender, does not visit temples regularly. However, his faith in God is unshakable. What makes him feel that God is real is the ´life´ around him.
“Who puts life in something or what is ´life´? It is God indeed. And you look at the nature. You can feel the intervention or the art of the supreme everywhere,” he says.
Gurung does feel bad the way our society discriminates the gender minority, and attributes it to the ´narrow-mindedness of human being´ rather than anything else.
“Why to drag God in between? God has not discriminated against us. He has given us equally warm and beautiful heart. We are equally capable of living and loving. But it is due to the domination of the heterosexual in society that we have been misunderstood and marginalized,” says the 32-year-old.
Agrees Prem Pashwin. He views God as the ultimate savior. “The reason we feel more connected to God is because we are so badly misunderstood by the people around us. This makes us realize that our society is full of people who fail to feel, accept or understand anything that is different than them or they do. And then, we turn to God while trying to understand the life and its mysteries better,” Prem says.
Prem recently visited Bangalamukhi temple with his partner Niraj. The purpose of the visit was to seek the blessing of the goddess who is believed to be kinder towards lovers. “His family members do not know that he is my type. It is going to be disastrous if he reveals his sexual identity. We are worried and we keep visiting temples for blessing,” Prem said.
Prem feels comfortable on feminine role and Niraj assumes the role of husband. On the day of ´tika´, Niraj would be putting ´tika´ on Prem´s forehead and bless him like the normal couples.
The occasion of Dashain is important for Laxmi and Meera for the same reason. In fact, Meera, the wife, feels deeply hurt if she has to miss the ´tika´ from the husband for any reason. “One year, we could not meet during Dashain. I felt very bad and did not like to accept tika from anyone,” Meera says.
During Dashain, Meera touches the feet of Laxmi after the latter put tika on her forehead. She has been doing so since their first Dashain together 12 years ago, except for one.
“Simply because we have different sexual orientation, we cannot have different religious practices. I have seen the wives touching the feet of the husbands during Dashain since I was a child, and I simply love the tradition,” says Meera. “So I do it willingly.”
Laxmi does not feel good at all to let her partner touch her feet. However, she goes on with that for the sake of her happiness. “Meera is very religious. Not only the tika of Dashain, she engages herself very deeply in every religious activity. So I have to take it lightly when she touches my feet during that occasion.”
Laxmi informs that religious harmony among the people in the community of gender minority is equally beautiful.
Badri Pun, president of ´Inclusive Forum Nepal´ agrees that the discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation could be one of the reasons why the people are more into God and prayers. “When you are left alone and distressed, you are bound to seek help. Probably, that is the reason why the people like us cannot deny the existence of God.”
Related story
Who is God?
