On her visit to Kathmandu, Devi shares this story. She had told her mother that she wanted to stay home. However, she didn’t listen to her. “I stayed for 22 days in chau,” she scolded her daughter, instead. Devi explains that when a girl is in chau, she is forbidden from drinking milk and curd. No one can see her. A rule also states that the girl cannot touch a warm cotton cloth. Devi’s experience during her chau stay was physically and mentally difficult for her.
Many young girls share Devi’s experience. Girls from 33 districts exchanged their stories. Jamuna Rokaya cannot go to school for three days every month. “Earlier, it was five days,” she says. A class nine student of Janjyoti Secondary School in Dahakot, Bajura, Jamuna’s five day seclusion was minimized to three days with the effort of her Child Club. Teachers and guardians now say that a girl cannot attend school for three days.
A temple is situated right next to her school. It is accepted that a menstruating girl should not touch or enter a temple. Jamuna’s club is trying to stop this practice. “The old custom should not be discontinued,” saying this, teachers and guardians did not agree to bring in changes. Jamuna says, “They say that it’s for the gods.”
Jamuna says girls are expected to do a lot of household chores because they are daughters. “We have no time for our homework because we are busy with the chores,” says Jamuna, “The level of attendance of the girls is low as they fear that the teachers will punish them for not completing their homework.”
It is also commonly accepted that a daughter should marry at a young age, preferably below the age of 15. She gave an example of a 50-year-old government employee marrying a 13 year old girl. She rues that no one listened to her when she tried to protest.
Sima Chaudhary had to work as a ‘Kamlari’ because she was a daughter. Sima, from Kailali, recounts the sorrow of working for three years as a Kamlari. Her father remarried after his first wife couldn’t give him a son. His second wife was unsuccessful too. He remarried again. Sima is the second daughter of the third wife. At the same time, the second wife gave birth to a son. The problem of making ends meet arose with the addition of family members.
During a planting season, “there was no food in the house,” recalls Sima, “My mother was frying some soybeans that she had brought.” Two men came to talk with her father. They said, “You have a problem raising your daughter, we will look after her and send her to school.” Sima didn’t refuse either. She, then, went to work as a Kamlari in Bhasi Village in Mahendranagar. Though, they provided food and a place to stay, she wasn’t sent to school.
“How shall I talk about those sad days,” says Sima, “I cooked food, washed the dishes, washed clothes, made tea for the guests and took care of the cattle.”
She worked for one and a half years. As it became more difficult for her, an older Chaudhary girl took her to another house. It wasn’t easier there. She stayed for another one and a half years. With the help of an organization she left the house. Now 18 years of age, Sima studies in class eight.
Triyuga, Udaypur’s Ambika Pariyar has a similar experience. Many parents don’t send their daughter to school. A student of class 10 at Rastriya Higher Secondary School, Ambika and her friends has started Divyajyoti Child Club in their school. She states that members of the club advices parents to send their daughters to school. Ambika says, “Many parents believe that it’s of no use to send their daughters to school. They think that the daughters will ultimately have to go to someone else’s house.”
Parents consider it a waste to spend money and educate girls not realizing that they don’t need money to send their daughters to school The members of the club go around trying to convince these parents. Ambika says that some positive changes have occurred out of the campaign.
National Planning Commission (NPC) is in the process of making a five year plan for the adolescents. Issues like education, health, skill development will be addressed, states Aatma Ram Pandey, Joint Secretary at the NPC. 23% of Nepal’s total population is comprised of adolescents aged 10 to 19 years. Plan Nepal has also started a five year campaign with the message ‘Because I am a girl’.
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