To Modi ji from us
Yes, we are entirely dependant on you and, in terms of bilateral give and take, we take a lot more than we can ever give. But, no matter what our situation or condition, we are a sovereign country that would like to be treated as such.
Dear Modi ji,
Namaskar!
Welcome to Nepal (again)! I hope you had a good flight. I wanted to know if you could find the time to come by my house during your visit here because the road in front of it is in urgent need of repair. I can offer you the finest Nepali tea – the same tea, whose exports your customs agents and officials are currently working overtime to restrict. You, of course, will be extremely busy and there is no chance of a visit happening but there’s no harm in asking, I suppose. It’s certainly worth it if it means having a fresh coat of paint on my house and a brand-new cosmetically enhanced road with a life span of two weeks.
We understand that you are used to a huge roadshow wherever you go and our government is currently bending over backwards not to disappoint you. I’m actually surprised that they are not laying on a red carpet for you everywhere you go. But don’t you worry, we have spruced up the Janaki temple after neglecting it all these years, stopped tourists from their usual treks and, in Muktinath, we have even restricted worshippers and put God on standby for a few hours. Just for you! The only thing left for us to do now is wear saffron robes, wave the tricolour, and line the streets for you.
But while our government is busy in trying to ingratiate itself with you, you might find the citizenry here not quite so receptive to your visit. In fact, some of us happen to find our government’s conspicuous kowtowing in particularly bad taste given that many of us still haven’t forgotten the blockade. Yes, it’s still fresh in our minds and just for the record, it was called a blockade then and we still call it a blockade now. I’ve been told that some civil society leaders are apparently pressing for an apology from you but you and I both know that it’s not going to happen. Although, what you can do, at the very least, is spare us the nausea of hearing the words ‘Mitron’ and ‘Doston’ in your speeches because, as you know, we haven’t exactly been BFF’s lately.
Two-day Huawei Digital Nepal Conclave 2022
While we don’t really doubt your religious devotion, we reckon that a huge part of your visit is also geared to putting on a charm offensive to mend fractured relations. In fact, I suspect even as I write this that you are trying to learn a few lines of Nepali to unleash on an unsuspecting audience that will, in all probability, be met with a round of applause. But while our politicians will no doubt thump their tables and wet themselves with glee, in our minds it’s going to take more than a few lines of Nepali to undo your government’s recent attitude towards our country.
Yes, we are entirely dependant on you and, in terms of bilateral give and take, we take a lot more than we can ever give. But, no matter what our situation or condition, we are a sovereign country that would like to be treated as such. We are told that you have a few ‘surprise’ gifts for us. Well, I hope it’s not another blockade! (Sorry, couldn’t resist that). You know, there’s not a lot that we want – although, if you could get Delhi Daredevils to give Sandeep Lamichhane a game, it would make us very happy.
Jokes aside, what we really want is a friend with an outlook befitting a superpower aspirant at our doorstep, not a garden variety neighbourhood bully. Remember your words at the SAARC Summit ‘in the life of an individual or a nation, a good neighbourhood is a universal aspiration’. It’s time to start walking the talk. If it’s really our hearts and minds you are after, this mutual respect is at the top of our wish list. Everything else will follow. Like I alluded to earlier, it’s really the thought rather than the size of the gifts that counts.
Anyway, we hope that you enjoy your stay in Nepal. We are told that you like the occasional photo op and are quite the social media user. Well, this is as picturesque a country as any to really up your social media game and to top it off you will find that our world-renowned hospitality remains as warm as it was on your first visit here. Despite all our misgivings and scepticisms, we really hope that your visit can reboot our so called ‘roti beti’ relations for a new age. As for the tea, I won’t be expecting you but, in case you have some free time, let me know when I should put the kettle on.
Thanks.
With conditional love,
From the Nepali people
The writer loves traveling, writing, and good food when he is afforded an escape from the rat race. He can be contacted at gunjan.u@gmail.com