Snobbing it down

Published On: September 24, 2016 12:25 AM NPT By: Dinkar Nepal


When Mrs Dahal is mocked for not knowing the way of the rulers, one realizes why the Maoist movement was born
The body language of Mrs Sita Dahal, the spouse of our prime minister, was the hot topic in social media right from the Dahal couple’s state visit to India. 

The couple was greeted by the Indian prime minister at the Rashtrapati Bhavan in New Delhi. Mr Modi, as we all know, is a forced bachelor. He has a wife but doesn’t live with her. Our Mrs Dahal was in a strange situation. When the two prime ministers were interacting, in a photograph that was much talked about, she was seen disinterested. The picture of hers standing with folded arms, visibly uncomfortable in the situation, at a distance from the prime ministers, became a masala for the social media. 

The issue got more attention because the week before that, during the Foreign Affairs Minister Prakash Sharan Mahat’s visit, the gift presented to the Indian counterpart Sushma Swaraj had become a talk of the town in Kathmandu. It was not because of the content but because of how it was presented. 

The officials who accompanied the minister, it seems, forgot about the presentation at the last moment. The minister tried to indicate and instruct his associate, first delicately and then deliberately; finally the gift, wrapped in a red shopping bag, was brought out from the shoulder bag of the associate. It was photographed in the process. The photographs were released uncensored. Unsurprisingly, the red bag caught all the attention back home.   

Opposition got a lot to make fun of. Based on this, questions were raised about the training of our bureaucrats and also about the preparation level of our diplomacy. In the same flow, the first instance of a hint of faltering in etiquette by Mrs Dahal was picked and made the victim of public judgment. Questions were raised about her credibility as the spouse of the prime minister.

In a strange way, when Mrs Dahal is made fun of for not knowing the way of the rulers, one realizes why the Maoist movement was born. And why a particular section of our society has no option but to be sympathetic towards the Maoists always.

Point to note about the reaction on social media is the patronizing attitude. The group active in the social media is already an elite section of the society. Mentioning that Mrs Dahal should be ‘taught’ something hints at an elitist view that starts with the assumption that people like her are not supposed to be at that position. Mostly coming from the western-educated people of the valley, whom the current prime minister had once referred to as the sukila-mukila, this is clearly an example of the feudal mindset.

There was a time when Mahatma Gandhi was not allowed to enter the British Parliament because of his dhoti. Today, the same parliament has erected a statue of the Mahatma, in the same attire, at the entry alongside two of its greatest leaders.  

Etiquettes have different symbols in different cultures. According to contexts, body language has different meanings. An eye contact, seen as the ‘must do’ thing while talking to someone in the western culture, is seen as disrespectful in eastern societies.

At the stage in a function organized to welcome the Prime Minister, at Patanjali Yogpeeth at Haridwar, Acharya Balkrishna, the Chair of the Institution, hugged Mrs Dahal, saying he finds her like his mother. Mrs Dahal was quick to reply, ‘I find you like my son.’ She added, pointing to her son, ‘just like an elder brother to my son Prakash.’  

I was at the function and I was definitely proud of her dignified ease and well-timed response. And I too find the image of all village-mothers in her because of the natural simplicity, like my own mother. 

The social media cannot be ruled by any etiquette on how not to disrespect a lady for who she is. But prominent journalists, who can use words like weapons, should definitely learn some manners and etiquettes themselves.  

As Prateek Pradhan, editor of Baahrakhari.com said in a tweet, ‘When outside, he is OUR Prime Minister. He represents the country.’

Mrs Dahal represents a lot. And till the time the elite learn to respect that, inclusion is difficult to achieve.

Twitter: @dn_ktm


Leave A Comment