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Published On: June 13, 2018 06:22 AM NPT By: Republica

Respecting space betters relationship

Respecting space betters relationship

Dear Sadichha,
I am a 28-year-old guy currently living in Kathmandu. I run a small business and it’s doing well. My family and friends are impressed with my work. However, my girlfriend is currently studying in Australia and I know how tough it is for her to manage everything on her own. She has been asking me to marry her, and move to Australia. I have a well-set career here but I fear that if I move to Australia, I would have to start everything from scratch, and maybe even work as a dishwasher. I am really confused. Please suggest me what I can do. 

It’s good to hear that you have set up a business and it is doing well. If you are satisfied with your work here, and you see the potential for further growth, I suggest continuing your work. Also, there is no place like home. I have seen many people come back after decades of living abroad. No matter what, you can’t have the same rapport with people abroad like you have with your family and personal connections back home. You also mentioned that your girlfriend is studying in Australia. Is she studying something that can help you with your business? Can she be a part of it? Find ways to get her involved to help you. Explain how well your business is going. Let her know that you’re happy and confident about your success. People in love want the best for each other. I think if you take the time to explain to her how you see your future together in Nepal, she will be able to come back after her studies. After all, home is where the heart is. 

Dear Sadichha,
I am a 24-year-old guy from Biratnagar. I have been in a relationship for the past four years but my girlfriend has been acting weird. When I tried to talk about it, she told me she wanted a little break because I have been consuming all her spare time. We hardly talk for few minutes over the phone and seldom meet. I don’t want to lose her but this break feels scary. 

I will be blunt and say it here ‘taking a break’ shows that the relationship for at least one person isn’t heading in the right direction. How often do you guys meet for her to mention that you have been consuming all her spare time? I know it’s not easy when the person you love wants to stay away from you. However, looking at the things from a positive side, maybe now you can also do the things you have always wanted to do but never found the time for. Maybe taking a break for a while could bring the two of you closer. Take time to analyze this relationship of yours. How have the past four years been? Have the two of you gotten stronger together? Has there been personal growth? Give her the space that she is asking for now. The more you try to be with her when she is asking for space the more she will push you away. Remember they say distance makes the heart grow fonder.

Dear Sadichha,
I am a 24-year-old girl currently working in a Kathmandu based NGO. I chose social work as the major subject for my bachelors. I wanted to collect professional experience, so I started working. It has been 2 years since and now I feel that I need to continue my studies. However,  I don’t want to do my masters in social work, as my interest in economics and business is growing.  I was wondering if you could help me with your valuable advice.

It’s okay to change subjects; most people end up working in entirely different areas than what they study. I urge you to evaluate your experience with the NGO. How has it been? Where would you like to work with your majors as economics and business in the future? Also, it is very important to find work and be employable after your studies. Or, maybe you would want to start something of your own. I would suggest seeing the possibilities of working while you study as well. Most of the courses for masters here take place in the evening or early morning to encourage students to work while studying. Research on the institutions that offer the subjects you want to study and consult a senior who has taken those subjects.  Gather as much information as possible and then make your decision. All the best for your future.

Dear Sadichha,
I am a 28-year-old woman. I completed my bachelor’s a few years back, after which I got married and left my studies. I am basically busy with household chores but I want to continue my further studies. I have been looking out for some colleges to enroll myself in distance learning courses. However, I feel that attending a college and participating in an interactive environment would be more fruitful. What should I do? How could I get it done?

First of all, kudos for even thinking about wanting to continue your studies. Education is very important, and I feel it is the first step towards self-empowerment. I suggest enrolling in a college rather than opting for distance learning. Prepare a list of colleges that offer courses at the time of your convenience. I have always felt that women can contribute more than just through household chores. Not saying that household chores are easy, it takes so much more than an academic degree to manage a home. I really hope you continue and materialize this thought, and continue your education. It might be challenging but I hope you won’t give up.



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